Many adults with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) find the dance of human interactions overwhelming. They may struggle with eye contact, limited interest in small talk, awkward interactions, difficulty reading social cues, sensitivity to light, sound, smell, anxiety, and a desire for a consistent schedule. Of course, all autistic people are different and present different behaviors in varying degrees. For example, you may have no problems making a bit of small talk but get spun when hit suddenly with loud noises, bright lights or funny smells. But they all lack the natural agreeableness and likeability required to survive and dominate in social contexts.
In Nigeria, the decision to disclose your ASD diagnosis is not a path often taken. I may have to come back after super deep research to share a real-world example of an individual or individuals with autism who have successfully navigated the workplace without masking. Till then, let’s work with the notes I’m making here. 😀
Here in Nigeria, and even in many first-world countries, the workplace systems and processes are typically optimized for the neurotypical individual and disclosing is only reasonable in situations where coworkers and employers already have knowledge of ASD, support neurodiversity, and are willing to genuinely and continuously accommodate individual needs of persons with ASD.
In many cases, it is almost always accurate to assume that disclosure could come with negative consequences; from missing out on people-facing promotions to constantly being put on dialed-down paths because your company believes high intensity roles may not be the best business decision for the organization.
FOMO has led to what we call masking.
As a Nigerian living with ASD, once you are clear on the career milestones you must scale to achieve psychological success in the Nigerian corporate world, you need to immediately get to work so you can win despite everything literally set up against you.
At the end of the day you’ve got to put your big girl or big boy pants on and do what you have to do, and there’s no point in crying and venting and being frustrated for too long because nobody can help you like you can help yourself and more importantly, you cannot help other people like you till you learn the rules of the corporate game, and play the game well.
Once you are done with your initial recce of the structures, processes, culture and technology of your new employers, you would need to decide on which behavioural and technical skills are the most important to succeed there and be noticed and immediately intentionally plan out how you might want to improve or develop those skills.
You would also have concluded on whether or not it would be a good idea to make requests for reasonable changes to be made to accommodate needs such as your sensory issues. Explain nicely what sensations are distracting and uncomfortable for you. You just might have coworkers who are willing to accommodate your needs.
Masking is a charade. For example, when colleagues (especially superiors) make small talk or craack jokes, you must perfect the art of laughter, even if you did not quite catch the punchline. Socializing at the cafeteria? Have your brief “friendly chit-chat” script ready in case a chatty colleague decides to sit next to you. Do not get too focused on perfection at first so it is not too obvious that you are forcing agreeableness or likeability. These hacks may take some time to get used to. Do not put any undue pressure on yourself. Take it one day at a time.
While masking may be a great workplace survival tool, I know you’d wish you could just stroll into the halls and announce, “I’m autistic guys, and that’s okay!”.
Buuuuuuuuut. To reach the top of the corporate skyscraper (if that’s a personal goal), autistics must learn the dance, and dance the dance; only then can they soon wield the power to sprinkle neurodiversity magic into the corporate cauldron”.
Basically, you are not going to be able to effect change on a grand scale unless you have power. Play the game till you can rest.
By the way this is how you would most likely feel after a whole day of masking.
I will be writing for employers next! It is so important to begin to think of developing, implementing and maintaining inclusive policies that foster a culture of acceptance and understanding of autistics so that they do not have to mask 24/7. It’s hard having to dim your authenticity to survive and it could also lead to faster burnout, mental health issues and reduced job satisfaction.
As an employer, you would be pleased at the positive outcomes if you took a chance.